Dear Barack and Michelle, and Joe and Jill and David,

and all of you who keep sending me e mails,

Stop already will ya ?

The wannabe actors and actresses in the neighborhood are preoccupied on
the cell phones with their publicists worried about the next audition
and getting invited to the Oscars to be seen with the right people.
 The would be pop/alt/rock stars next door (who really suck) are busy
pining for an appearance on American Idol, trolling for 360 deals,
“going on tour” in Bakersfield, getting a new manager and building
bonfires in the back yard to create their own version of an after hours
“destination”.   The rest of us in the neighborhood, who mostly make
our living in the entertainment biz are bracing for the big drop in
production and post production that's coming later this year from the
studios and wondering where the jobs are coming from.  And, a quick
word on the the collapsing major label music industry  -  please don't
give them a bail out.  Let 'em merge with GM/Chrysler and sink with
good riddance into oblivion.  They could not deserve it more.

Second, this continuing money hunt you direct at me is really all about
raising the dough to repay Hillary's campaign debt.  Yeah, I know
that's the deal you made with her and all but c'mon, this woman has 100
million bucks.  None of us here really care whether she spent 20
million of it in one of the most despicable displays of old school
scorched earth political campaigning in our lifetime.  She's got plenty
of ways to pull it in.  I'm not interested in giving her anything.  
Let her get it from Bill.  He's not paying for all that mile high club
sex he's having flying around on his billionaire buddies' luxury jets.
 His pals pay his way – he's got low overhead so get it from him.  
She's just trying to build the war chest for the “Senator” Chelsea
campaign that's coming up in a few years and I say let young Chels
raise her own dough just like you did.

Third, I'm a little annoyed that you picked a racist, homophobic,
anti-semite, evangelical christian, charlatan, snake oil peddler to do
your inaugural invocation.  But, hey, I get it – you have to reach out
to the creeps who thought Palin was cool,  Billy Graham is too old and
you have to continue a bad tradition.  But enough of that after the
inauguration ok ?   By the way, not now, but in, oh, say February -
please consider taxing the bejeezus out of these organized religions.
 All of 'em.  Especially Rick Warren.  Can go a long way to fixing
those trillions in the deficit.  They've got the dough.  Reverend Ricky
has a car and driver and buku bucks – more than I can say for the poor
schmoos in his congregation he soaks to support that phoney mega church
of his.  I'm for free speech for all and I have no problem with guys
like him continuing to spread their dangerous. manipulative blather,
own huge amounts of real estate and media empires – I just don't think
they should be able to do it tax free.

Now back to the “send more money” e mails.   This is starting feel like
telemarketing and you're making me consider putting you on the “do not
contact” list.  I was under no delusion that any of these robo
generated e mails coming from any of you during the campaign were
really coming from you – but I kind of liked it at the time.  But,
enough now.  I don't believe Jill is actually writing me an e mail to
ask for more dough to “continue the important work we have started.”  
The webmaster is.  So don't insult me.  I gave you money to get elected
 - and plenty of it.  Campaigned for you, stood in line for 4 hours to
vote for you.  Sat emotionally with tears in my eyes while I watched
your acceptance speech like everyone else.   Enough.  You got it.  Get
on with it now.  The inauguration choo choo is very sweet and clever
and all that – but so is queuing up at Disneyland with the dumb Pluto
hat on or standing in line with elf ears on waiting to see Santa.  Have
fun – but on Wednesday the 21st, I'd like you all to stop gobbling
around and start getting some stuff done so we don't fall off the edge
and end up reporting to the Chinese.

Send me e mails about the new puppy, or how you jailed and seized the
assets of all those Wall Street assholes who ruined so many people's
lives and who profited while they lost their clients' money – or posted
their photos, addresses and phone numbers on the web so lynch mobs can
easily be formed.   Send e mails about the spanking line you created to
escort the Cheney's out of the VP mansion,  or how you told Pelosi,
Feinstein and Reid they are obtuse and made them wear clown suits
during session – or how you laughed out loud when GM came back for even
more money – or you actually gave the porn industry some bail out money
just because they had the balls to ask for it.   E mails with You Tube
links of you having a chili three way dog are good – but no more “we
need your help” e mails.  You got my help – you have my support.  Go
fix it now.   Get it done.

I spend too much time online as it is,  I'm starting to develop a
Facebook addiction and there are no support groups for that yet – so
don't give me more reasons to read useless stuff on my laptop.

Go on – go . . . do it.  Leave me be – I have stuff to do.

happy regards,

John